Christmas is our family's most favorite time of the year. For the kids I am sure it's because they get gifts. But for me it's a time for tradition, giving, and focusing on Christ as the most precious gift to us. Ever since Caleb can walk and play hide-and-seek, we have established the family tradition of reading through the Christmas story and acting it out on Christmas day. Then we play find baby Jesus. Someone would hide the doll and we dressed up as wisemen to find Jesus. I love any opportunities to direct the boys' attention away from gifts and to Christ. We didn't get anywhere during the break, but had lots of rest and fun at home.
Right after we put our tree up after Thanksgiving, Mui-mui started to not want to nap. She would cry hysterically every time we put her down to sleep, during the day time and at night. H's theory is that the Christmas decoration triggered some memories from the most traumatic part of her life. We brought her home last Christmas. It was a lot for a baby to go through having been removed from what she is used to. She spent a few weeks of crying herself to sleep. At one point, she climbed out of her crib multiple times because she just didn't want to nap. The crib is pretty high, but she managed to get both her legs out and just jump. She is very strong willed and determined. Now her sleep is much better. She is willing to sleep at night. But still fights her nap. She will sleep if I put her down, but won't do it for the nanny. She has to sit next to her until she falls asleep.
First time Mui-mui trims the tree. She loves getting into my fragile box of ornaments. Makes me nervous.
J is getting too big to sit on my lap. But he is still my bebe.
We spent two fun filled days in Disneyland on Thanksgiving and had a blast. Our kids are so blessed to be able to go to Disneyland so many times (this was the boys' third trip and Mui's first). I remember going to Disneyland only once my entire childhood. All three times, we went with our vacation buddies, the Tran family. We travel well together with them because both kids and adults are friends. Our hotel was only two miles from the park and it has full kitchen and hot breakfast.
Holidays at Disneyland was magical. It was nicely decorated with Christmas lights.
The boys are taller now and can ride on most roller coasters. They went on almost every one, even Space Mountain (roller coaster in the dark). I have to admit it was a bit scary for me, not knowing what to expect next.
This ride goes pretty fast. Even baby J is on the ride.
Mui loved the fast ride. What dare devil!
Mui was mesmerized by the parade. Just like the boys were the first time they saw it.
Lately J has been learning in Awana about missionaries and what they do. He naively thinks that once someone tells a non-believer about God that he/she would become a Christian. He knew that my parents are not Christian and asked how come we didn't tell Gung-gung and Po-po about God. I told him that's not the case and some people may choose not to believe. He became concerned for my parents and others who are not Christian. He volunteer to pray for those who do not know Christ. So he's been thinking a lot about salvation.
Yesterday, he told me that he is glad that everyone in our family are Christian. I personally didn't share the gospel with him yet and wasn't sure if he had officially accepted Christ. I asked him whether he pray to confess his sins and let God know that he believes that Jesus came to die for our sins and rose again on the third day. He said no. I told him that he is not a Christian because his parents are Christians or because he goes to church. Everyone must choose for himself whether we believe or not. Then I told him that I will show him how to be a Christian after dinner. So after dinner he reminded me that he wants to be a Christian.
Just like we did for C, we took J to ChuckeCheese to celebrate because the angels are rejoicing. Praise the Lord that J is thinking about spiritual things and are ready.
Mui's first time to ChuckeCheese. Loves all the excitement!
This is Mui-mui's first Halloween. We dressed her in the Mak family costume made by K's mom. All Mak kids wore it. Can you recognize who is who?
We recently allowed her to have a lollipop. She loved it so now she knows what candy is. There was a parade and trick-or-treating at the boys' school. I brought Mui along. At first she didn't know what we were doing. I showed her how to go up to people to get candy. After seeing what she can get, she knew how to spot people who are giving out candies and she made her way up to them. With her cute look people would give her candies first.
We attended All Church Camp mainly because H loves leading a large crowd to worship. I go because, as a family, I want to support H in an area that God has called him to serve in. God knew that I needed to rest in His presence, be renewed spiritually, and go before the Lord in genuine worship. I got plenty of rest physically because after putting the kids down to sleep, we basically have to turn off the light. Once the light is off, I literally fell asleep in less than 10 minutes.
H and the team did a great job in worship. They practiced and carefully choose songs that the Chinese and English congregations can sing, at the same time teaching new songs. They are truly more than instrumental players. Their voices and sharings led people to focus on God and His greatness. I had a great time singing my heart out to God. Here are some of the songs that brought me before my Savior unhindered.
The speaker was wonderful and very practical. He had action item suggestions after every sermon. He talked about encouragement, forgiveness, integrity, and spiritual gifts. Every sermon is applicable, but my mind kept thinking about the sermon regarding encouragement. He opened with how encouragement is so important to everyone. Encouragement is second on the list of what human need from each other. Number one is a listening ear. Love and affection is way down on this list. This actually got my attention. Encouragement is the second most important thing in our interaction with people, yet it is not offer much at all. It's easier to crititize and complain than to encourage. Even in the secular whole, Charles Schwab stated the following about encouragement:
I consider my ability to arouse enthusiasm among men the greatest asset I possess. The way to develop the best that is in a man is by appreciation and encouragement.
I have yet to find the man, however exalted his station, who did not do better work and put forth greater effort under a spirit of approval than under a spirit of criticism.
Perhaps I was captivated by this because I was criticized by my boss for doing something I didn't think was inappropriate. Is it really true that if more encouragement is offered that people would perform better than criticism offered as constructive feedback? I don't know, but it doesn't hurt to try.
Four aspects of encouragement:
1. Complement the faithful
2. Comforting the hurting
3. Challenging the complacent
4. Exhorting the discouraged
Techniques for encouragement:
1. A spoken word
2. A written word
3. A listenigh ears
4. A gentle touch
5. Hospitality
6. A thoughful gift
7. Acts of service
8. Prayers
9. A warm smile
I was upset at something at work today, it's so complicated that it's hard to explain. However, it not important what got me upset, but what's more important is how God met me where I am and talked to me.
After experiencing unpleasant feelings and anger, I immediately called H. He, of course, was encouraging and always on my side. But even after our hour of conversation, I was still upset and discouraged. I tried to work and do things to overcome those feelings and prevent it from happening again. When I am unhappy, I also like to watch TV and eat to suppress my feelings. But when I was about to do that, I asked myself, "Why are you turning to people and things to help you? Why are you not turning to the Almighty God?" Sometime I just don't go to God because at times I open the Bible and read something that is not applicable to my situation. But tonight, I knew I needed to go to my Father. And so I did. I sat at my spot and opened the Bible. I read an article from the a devotion that I put off a long time ago called Indeed. Then I reminded myself that I need to read the BIBLE itself and not an article written by someone. So I opened a devotion for mothers and did the first devotion. It led me to 1 Cor 13, the verse about love. I then asked God to speak to me, what does love got to do with my situation? It's not applicable. I didn't hear God or see Him, but the Holy Spirit was definitely at work. I asked God, did I totally screwed up at work? Did I disgrace your name because everyone knew that I am a Christian. God made me realized that I shouldn't worry about what I did, but rather, I should focus on how I am going to react. That is what sets me, a Christian, apart from others. The passage about love was applicable after all. I need to respond in love. We are called to love those who hurt us and persecute us. Love is not easily anger and it keeps no record of wrongs. Love never fails. It never fails at home, at church, and even at work.
So there it is, God met me because He knew I needed Him and told me what He wants me to do. How do I respond in love? What do I do? That is what I am asking God now. I am tired and my emotion and brain are drained, so I am sure He will tell me another day.
I hope that this encourages you to go before the throne of grace in your time of distress. May Christ dwell in you richly.
With a blink of an eye the summer is over. I am not ready for homework and all the busyness. Today is first day in school for the boys. J was filled with excitement and C was a bit nervous. I want J to have a great year in Kindergarten and want him to have fun. All summer I prayed and ask around to see if there is a familiar face in his class. All his friends seem to be in other classes. But God is really good. He did prepare for J a friend from his preschool. Even though that friend was in a different class in preschool, they appearantly played together before and we even went to his birthday party last year. In the trial day of Kindergarten before the first day of school, J sat next to an old friend.
C seems to get the short end of the stick all the time in terms of class assignment. He always was given strict teachers. This year, he have two part time teachers. One teacher does not want to teach full time, so she will team teach with another teacher. I just don't like this arrangement. I fear that with two different expectations, teaching styles, and personalities, C will have a hard time opening up and the teachers. I really want him to enjoy and love school. I just have to trust that God is faithful. I am praying that He will open up my eyes so that I can see the positive instead of the negatives. I pray that C will thrive and succeed.
Sitting next to an old friend from Happiness Hill.
The final step in the adoption process is to have the adoption legalized and recognized in California. We had to take Mui-mui to see the Judge in the Superior Court. Once the adoption is recognized in CA, we can apply for a California birth certificate. Mui-mui wasn't born in a hospital in China, so she didn't have a birth certificate. We are finally done with all adoption paperwork.
Mui-mui is thriving and learning new things everyday. Recently, she can do a few new things. She can repeat the sounds that we make. She can use the all powerful word "no". When she wants something and we give her the wrong thing, she would say "no" and shake her head. And she can say the word "give" in Cantonese. When she wants something, she would point to it, stretch out her hands and say "give".
My family enjoys camping, so we tried to go annually. This year we went to Big Basin Redwood Forrest in Santa Cruz. I have to admit, this year I was not that excited to go because K is still small and I was fearful of mosquitoes. At all church camp in Santa Cruz last year, I got three bites that still itches till today. K did not like camping because she can't climb, roll around on the ground, get into trouble, and she didn't get much sleep. I was thankful that my parents and Uncle prepared all the food and also cooked it. I spent the entire time looking after K, which tired me out. H bought all kinds of insect repellent for me and the kids. We had insect repellent with 64% deets for me, natural and nontoxic repellent for the kids, repellent only made for clothes and equipments, citronella candles, OFF powerpad lamp, and OFF clip on. I guess all those things worked. I left with only ONE bite on my forehead. I forgot to put repellent on my face.
Hebron took the time there to teach J how to ride two wheels. At home J was nervous about riding without training wheels because he said he is not as old as his big brother. But we assured him that if he tried, he will be able to do it. Sure enough after alittle while he was able to balance and ride, but can't stop or start. After another session, he learned to stop. But was not very good at it. J told H, "I am so proud of myself. I am such a big boy." Unfortunately before we ended the second session, J ran into a wall and hurt himself badly. We had to take him to urgent care. The doctor said that the injury was not as bad as it looked. Praise the Lord for that!
San Luis Obispo is a special place for H and I. It is where we met, grew in the Lord, learned to serve God, met many of our good life long friends, and of course earned our degrees. We love Cal Poly and had fun walking on campus again. It brought back so many great memories. We passed by Yosemite dorm rooms where I stayed during my freshman year and where H and I tried to "study" together. It is the place where H tried to impressed me with his piano skills. It's worked! I admire someone who can improvise on the piano. We stayed up many many night in the lounge to worship God. H and I lived in the same apt complex after I moved off campus. Mustang village was where I shared a tiny room with two other girls. Then after that both H and I moved to Boysen Street where we lived two doors from each other. Along with our roommates, we started a cooking schedule. Each person cooks one night for everyone. This way we have hot food daily without having to cook everyday. Yes, H actually cooked in college.
Then: At pismo beach with our roommates and friends (1996). Can you find H? I was holding the camera.
Now: At pismo beach 15 years later with our kids.
Then: Look at how young we were.
Now: On the same surrey three kids and 30 + pounds later.
We are currently in San Luis Obispo. We normally take a vacation in the summer, this year we've decided to make a weekend road trip to the the place where H and I met. We can reminis and also bum out at Pismo Beach. When we were students, we love going to Thai Classic in SLO, but it was getting pricey. H found another Thai restaurant on Yelp near our hotel, Thai Dheva. We decided to go because Yelp was selling a $20 coupon for $10.
Look at our meal! Four delicious dishes (fried rice, green curry with pork, green beans with tofu, and eggplants) and it was FREE to us. What did we do to get this? Nothing. How did we get it? Well, the couple at the next table, who were strangers to us, paid for our meal and ask the waiter not to tell us until they left. When the waiter told us, I was in shock. They did what? Why would they do such a thing? Who would do such a thing? They did a good deed without expecting anything in return, not even a thank you.
The Father has taught me so many lessons about giving in the recent year. The first lesson is to give generously to everyone. Most of us are giving to our family and friends. We often buy them gifts and treat them to dinner. What about the people we don't know or don't know so well? Our adoption and this experience of generosity from strangers made me think about who I am to give to. During our adoption fundraising, there were many many people who generously supported us; some are good friends, some are strangers, some we didn't know so well, and some of them I have not heard from in a long time. Everyone gave out of their giving hearts. Again, I thank you with all my heart. The strangers at the restaurant made me think about the people that I give to and the people I don't give to either intentionally or unintentionally. I am not sure if you are like me. I don't hesitate to give to those in need. Well, that's because those people can't provide for themselves. But I don't intentionally seek out for opportunities to give to people I perceived to be financially well off. This experience taught me to be generous to everyone because generosity itself is a blessing to both the giver and receiver. The strangers gave to us for the sole reason of blessing us. Not because of our good looks, my cute children, and certainly not because we looked needy. They knew we can afford it; we were there intending to pay for our own meal. God used their generosity to teach me something.
The second lesson I learned is to give without the expectation of anything in return, not even a "thank you". Those strangers gave to us but didn't give us the opportunity to thank them. Have you had the experience where you searched long and hard for a gift for someone or you got him/her a HUGE gift and you waited for that person to say "thank you" and express their appreciation? Most of the time, I don't wait for the appreciation, but sometimes I do. The waiting for the "thank you" is expecting something in return. We should not give expecting anything. I always teach the boys to say "thank you" to be polite and rightly so. We should be polite and say "thank you" for a gift. However, the generous giver does not expect appreciation. Good lessons learned.
Last week we hosted two junior high school boys from China. They came on a language program to visit the US. There were about 24 students staying with 12 different families from Jensen Ranch. We only had to provide them with breakfast and dinner. During the day, they participated in a program in Palo Alto. It was an interesting experience. Even though I can understand Mandarin, it was hard to communicate and speak the language. And they don't speak much English. So conversation are limited to "Are you hungry?" "Do you want juice?" "What did you do today?" "It's time to eat." "Are you tired?" "What do you need?"
We are always happy to open our home and share God's blessing. I tried to be a good host and expose them to some traditional American breakfasts and dinners. I get up early to make them hot breakfast everyday before going to work. (Boy, that was hard) The two Chinese students were respectful and polite. They ate everything I serve them, but not the fruits. I bet there are things that they didn't like, but ate anyways to be polite. I try not to torture them too much with American food by making one Chinese breakfast and dinner. We also took them out to dinner one night and to Boomers. Boys will be boys, so they had fun driving go kart, playing lazer tag, and mini golf.
I was surprised to find out how wealthy these students are. I have always thought that the majority of people in China are poor. I see otherwise through this experience and our trip to China in December. I guess as the country gains more wealth, so does its people. These students are from very wealthy families. They are meerly in Junior High and one boy bought himself an iPad2, the most expensive version. Another girl in the group bought her mom a Louis Vitton purse for $5000. From talking to the guide of the tour, these students' family own businesses and have net worth in the hundreds of million.
I was driving home yesterday in H's old Honda and it stopped three times as I climbed up the steap hill to our house. It stopped the first time at the first possible left on the long hill. I thought, "Oh no, is this car breaking down? We can't get another car." I then looked at the gas tank and it was empty. So I turned off the engine and turned it back on hoping that it will go just a little further up. And it did. I shifted to second gear hoping it would have enough power to take me up the hill to the traffic light. It huffed and it puffed and it went up a little more and stopped. I restarted the engine a few more time and it finally made it up the hill. It felt like I was in the story the Little Engine that Could. I was able to turn left at the traffic light and made it to Carson lane. Then the car completely stopped and can't move even an inch. It stopped right at the entrance to the short cut that leads to our house. What a blessing it was that the car made it and I didn't have to walk up the hill. I only have God to thank for that.
So why did I let the gas tank go to empty? First, the annoying empty indicator light is broken and it didn't come on. There are many other reasons, but most of all it's been a busy week. We are hosting a couple of students from China. So ever since last Friday I have been running around buying food and other things in preparation for their arrival. I made sure the fridge is stocked and have enough food to make them different varieties of breakfast and dinner everyday. H and I have to coordinate who is picking up our kids and the students. On top of that, H and I switched cars and I usually gas up my car on Wednesday. Gas station was not on my schedule for Monday and Tuesday. PTL that the car is not broken.
K has been with us for 7 months already. It's a short time, even though it felt like she's been with us since birth. In 7 short months, she adjusted so well that people and doctor can't tell that she spent 10 months in another country, speaking another language. Like all babies at this age, she has to learn how to communicate with her parents. On top of that, she has to adopt a new language while she learning to decode what adults are saying. I have to say she is doing extremely well. The Pediatrician only expects an 18 month old baby to say three words in the language she was born into. K is not even 18 months and she is able to say 9 words in two languages, both of which are not what she was born hearing. So she is developing really well. PTL for that! In English, she can say: hi, bye, more, Mommy, and Daddy. In Cantonese, she can say: hye (shoes), bie (to put), Mama, nie nie (milk), and bay (nose).
K is a smart girl. She can understands a lot of things and can figure things out from context. One time she got into the cabinet and took out the cover to my thermos and played with it. She hid it amongst the kitchen toys. I had no idea what she did to it. I saw that the cover is missing and while holding the thermos, I asked her in Cantonese where is the cover? She immediately turned around, headed straight to her kitchen toys, found the cover, and brought it back to me. I don't think she understood every word I said, but she was able to do what I asked her to. Amazing! I think most babies wouldn't remember where they put an item, let alone understand what I asked. She also picks up things we say rather quickly. Whenever I head to the laundry room or pick up my purse, she will quickly follow me and make sure that I get her shoes for her. She loves going out so much that whenever I say any of these phases to the boys, she will be the first to head over to the laundry room to put on her shoes: It's time to go, let's go, or put on your shoes. She is also doing well with the nanny. She no longer cries hysterically when I leave for work.
Today, I went to Val Vista park in Pleasanton to teach C how to ride a bike with no training wheels. We got these $10 pads for him that protected his hands, elbows, and knees, and I assured him that with these awesome pads, it will not hurt when he falls. And off we went! Here is a video of him after about an hour of learning. Not bad at all! He still has some trouble starting up, and rounding corners can be a bit tricky at times, but overall, he's doing great! We're so proud of him that we gave him 10 Pokemon cards as a reward. His bike actually looks small for him. He needs an 18" bike. If you have one that we can have or buy from, let us know. I will work on teaching the the second born another day. Teaching two in one day is too much.
I am soooooo excited to be able to officially drive my new Sienna van. We got it a couple weeks back and have been waiting for the license plate to arrive. Both our cars are made in the same year and are really old. We are afraid that they may break down in the future and we won't have enough money to get another car. After the adoption, we don't have any more cash to get a used car. So we have been waiting for the opportunity to get another car with 0% financing. The opportunity arrives to get this car when Toyota offers 0 down and 0% financing. Toyota often have this deal for their sudans, but not often for vans. At the same time, H (Hbrn) got a promotion at work. God's timing is perfect and He provided us with my very FIRST new car. H did his homework and got a great deal. So good that only a few dealers are willing to give us that price. Since I haven't had a new car before, I am kinda afraid to drive it. I am being very careful with it and not take it to the bad side of town or drive it too much. The boys love it, especially all the push botton features. H loves it for the blue tooth feature that can play the music from your iPhone and allows you to answer the phone using buttons on the wheel. I love it for the space and automatic sliding doors.
I've always imagined that when H gets me a new car, it'll come with a giant bow on top like in the commercials. H even asked the dealer where to get one. Unfortunately, you can't get one. Well, we have a tiny bow instead. We are truly blessed and thankful for God's provision.
Remember the commercial? "I love what you do for me, TOYOTA!"
Yesterday was my first day back to work. After having a baby clinging onto my side for almost three months, it weird not having her with me. Hebron was home with the nanny to show her what to do. Mui-mui drank milk from her in the morning. But refuses to drink milk from the nanny during the day and in the afternoon. In fact, before her afternoon nap, she threw a tantrum. I think that's because Hebron was home and she wanted Hebron to take care of her. She will need a few weeks to get use to her nanny. This morning when the nanny came, Mui-mui cling on to me like a piece of tape, fearing that I will leave her. I guess that is normal at the beginning.
Having a nanny is great! She is just who I need in my life. She cooked for us and cleaned the kitchen when Mui-mui slept. When I got home from work, I was able to spend some time with the kids and not worry about cooking because hot food was already on the table. She made a vegetable dish, a meat dish, and Chinese soup. I can get use to this. I hope this arrangement works out and Mui-mui likes her soon. It's making my life alot easier. Praise the Lord!
Today Hebron and I celebrated our 10th wedding anniversary. WOW! I can't believe it's already 10 years. We dated for 7 years, so that means we've known each other for 17 years, almost half my life. I've always thought we would have a big celebration for our 10th, either a big party or a get away. We didn't do any of that because we've been focused on the kids and I don't think Karissa is ready to leave me overnight. However, we still had a good celebration. We enjoyed the fun evening that Hebron planned thanks to our friends, the Trans, for watching our three kids. We first went to Yanagi Sushi and Grill in Dublin and had steak, shrimp, and chicken teppanyaki. Teppanyaki is a type of Japanese cuisine that the chef cook the food before your eyes. It's really simple cooking on an iron grill. Much like Mongolian BBQ. The food was ok, but much too pricey in my opinion. None-the-less I enjoyed it.
Then, we went horseback riding in San Ramon. Hebron chose this activity because we had fun horseback riding in Hawaii on our honeymoon 10 years ago. My idea of horseback riding is just sitting on a horse and a trainer would guide the horse while I am on it. But this riding lesson is really different than what I had expected. We learned to brush the horse, cleaned it's shoes, and put on the saddle all before we can ride. I am not an animal's person, so interacting and touching an animal scare me. So when I had to brush the giant horse from front to back, I was nervous. What if it kicks me? Then the trainer said that we have to clean it's shoes. If I accidentally poke her, she will definitely kick me. The trainer sensed that I was scared so she did it with me while Hebron did it himself. Then, we had to walk (not ride) our horses to the riding area. The horses aren't suppose to eat the grass or walk where they want. I was suppose to lead it and control it, but I can't do it. Along the way, the horse pushed me with its head and tried to walk away. Hebron's horse was so big that it was really intimidating to even stand next to it. Hebron couldn't really walk him either, so a little girl (who is a pro with horses), helped him. When we finally got to the riding area, the trainer was showing Hebron how to mount the horse while I was suppose to tie the horse to a fence. The horse didn't want me to do that so it kept walking away from the fence while I was trying to pull him back. My horse had a mind of its own. After I mounted the horse, we were taught how to tell it to go, stop, turn left or right, and reverse. My horse didn't want to obey me. It just likes walking. When I told him to stop, it would stop and then go before I was ready. The horses were gentle even though they looked intimidating. We had a lot of fun and even made the horses trotted a few times.
I thought being on maternity leave would give me more time to blog. But I have been busy with cooking for people and making Mui-mui's scrapbook. Mui is now 15 mons old. She actually understands alot of thing in Cantonese. Things that she understands are sit, eat it, don't eat it, kiss, where is your shoes? and give me the book. She can climb up and slide down the baby slide in our house. She is still very attach to me. When I am at home with her, she always wants to be by my side. And sometimes that's not enough, I have to hold her. She is us curious, friendly, outgoing, and a joy to have. Whenever, I take her to the park she would just walk up to a stranger and talk to her. She would even want them to hold her. Hmmmmm....not sure if she thinks everyone is her care giver.
She is definitely a girl. She loves shoes; her shoes and other people's shoes. We let her wear the pink soft Robeez shoes (see pix - she is ready to go out) inside the house to give her more traction. I would take them off when I put her to nap. As soon as she wakes up, she points to them and wants me to put them back on. Or when I change her diaper and take off her shoes, she would want them back on immediately. When I hold my keys and purse, she knows we are going to go out. So she would find her outside shoes and head to our laundry room, sit down on the floor and raise her leg so I can help her with her shoes.
Praise the Lord that we found a nanny to come to our house and care of Mui when I go back to work. She goes to our church and also takes care of our friends' mom. I just hope she will be good and can take good care of Mui and the boys. I am a little nervous about how it will be since we don't know her that well.
Thanks everyone for asking and for your prayers and concerns. Karissa is eating better. I realized that we have communication issues. She wants something, but we didn't know she was trying to tell us something by closing her mouth. We thought she didn't want to eat or not hungry. She is moody and has be to in the right mood to eat. Turns out that she does want to eat. She mainly wants to eat what we eat. The problem with that was that she didn't know how to chew. So I had to keep feeding her baby food and porridge. She was sick of those things. Now that she can chew, she is eating a wider variety of food. I have been making her chicken noodle soup and pasta.
I am now taking my maternity leave and staying at home with Karissa until the end of May. I thought I will have alot of free time not working. If you know me, you'll know that I am not the kind of person that sits around. I fill up my time home with activities that I normally can't do because I am at work, like visiting friends and cooking for them. I enjoy spending time with Karissa, but have been busy with errands, cooking daily, any my research paper and final. One main goal for my time at home is to make a scrapbook for Karissa documenting how God brought her to us. I really hope I can get this done, it's such a big project.
Monday was Karissa's appointment with the pediatric cardiologist at Children's Hospital. The technician took an echocardiogram of her heart. It is basically a 2D ultrasound of her heart. The doctor was able to see the hole and measured it. He said her condition is called Patent Ductus Arteriosus (PDA). All fetuses in the womb has a Ductus Arteriosus, a hole in the heart where oxygen rich blood can bypass the lung to get to the body. This is because fetuses does not need to breath through the lungs. But when the baby is born and starts to breath on her own, this hole should close. Karissa's hole measures 1.5 mm, which is 50% smaller than what was reported to us from China. This is great news! That means it is closing up on its own. The cardiologist said that we have nothing to worry about and there is a 85% chance that it will completely closed on its own. So for now all we have to do is monitor it. If it doesn't close in a couple of years, then he would recommend surgery.
What a relieve this is. We praise God for His healing hands upon Karissa. Hebron and I felt strongly that the Lord called us to adopt a child with a medical condition. God, in His infinte wisdom, knows what we can and cannot handle. So He gave us a child with a very minor condition. He used her heart condition to speed up the adoption process for us. If we did not step out in faith, even though we were nervous about the unknown, and pursue a child with a medical condition, we would still be waiting. Choosing to adopt a child with a medical condition was not what I orignally intended to do, so I was reluctant at the beginning. After we proceeded with this decision, I was still a bit scared. Everytime those fears surfaced, I felt God telling me to have faith and trust in Him. Now that I can see the entire picture, I realized that everything was part of God's plan. His plan is always the best.
Why does eating have to be a battle for all my children? Many adopted children from China eat really well. But not Karissa. I am not sure what is going on with her. For about a month now, she has been moody during meal time. In China, she ate everything and drank everything we gave her. After over coming jet-lap in the US, she ate alot too. So I know she has the capacity to eat. Something changed and she is not eating much at all. She does not like jar baby food, so my mom and I have been making fresh baby food for her. It's so frustrating when she doesn't eat. Many people say she will eat when she is hungry. Well, that is not completely true. She refuses to eat so we will do what she wants. After skipping a meal, I know she is hungry, but she gets moody. She wants a toy to play with when she eats. And because we want her to eat, we give it to her. Then she would throw it down on the ground and wants us to pick it up. If we don't pick it up, she won't open her mouth. So we pick it up and she takes a bite. Then she would throw it down again and refuses to eat until we get the toy. We also tried not giving her a toy. She would be soo grumpy and frustrated that she will wave her arms around to prevent us from feeding her and of course her mouth is shut. Ahhhhh......so frustrating. One of my pet peeve is feeding children who do not want to eat. Both of the boys were bad eaters. They didn't want to eat and when they do eat, they didn't eat much. But at least they are not moody.
Karissa does not know how to chew yet, so she can't eat table food as a full meal. Making baby food for her is a lot of work. Cooking meat and vegetable and blending it takes a long time. But I don't mind making it if she actually eats. I just don't know what to do with her. I am anxious and nervous every meal time. I really cannot tolerate moody children. If she is moody and does not want to eat, then maybe I just shouldn't feed her. But on the other hand, I want her to eat very badly. So part of me want to give in and pick up the toy everytime she drops it so she will eat. But emotionally, I know I won't be able to keep it up. Both Hebron and I are totally frustrated and don't know what to do. If you had the same experience and tried something with your kids that works, please let us know.
We are finally getting around to sending out birth annoucement/our annual family update. It's been such a adventure filled year that we want to dedicate this year's update to praising God and thanking Him for His love and provision. At the beginning of our adoption journey, we were filled with anxiety and fear. Now looking back, we can see that God was with us every step we took. If you still did not receive our newsletter update and want one, please send us an email. We might have gotten the wrong address or some how missed it.
My hopes, as a Christian mom, are that my children grow up knowing that they are loved by their Creator (God), loving Him whole heartedly, and serving Jesus Christ unreservedly. That is why I am constantly teaching the boys this verse. "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength." Deuteronomy 6:5.
I may stir up alot of constroversy for this statement; my goal is not to raise academically successful kids who will make it to Ivy league schools and earn lots of money. My definition of success is not the same as the world's definition of success and certainly not the same as "Tiger Mom." That does not mean I don't want them to strive for academic excellence. I, myself, am still going to school to get a master in business. What I mean is that I don't want to just focus on academic achievements, but rather to give the boys a good foundation in Biblical truth. I want them to know Christ and have the desire to know Him more, which is why I bring them to Awana every Wednesday night at Castro Valley First Baptist Church. Awana is a kids' club that teaches Biblical truth and emphasizes on scripture memory. The church runs Awana like the way my church (CIBC) runs vacation bible school in the summer. There are games, Bible memorization, messages, and singing. It is also similar to boy/girl scout in the sense that they can earn patches. After a certain amount of memory verses, they earn ironed-on patches and jewels. Caleb have been memorizing a few verses a week and Joshie one short verse a week. Because Awana is in the middle of the week, sometimes I don't want to take them, especially when I have lots to do for work and school. But Hebron and I make that a priority because we saw that they enjoy it and it establishes the discipline of memorizing God's word as a family. In addition to verses, Caleb also memorized all the books of the Old and New Testament. Joshie is learning too by following Caleb. Here they are singing it. Seeing how they learn made all my effort worthwhile.
We have the priviledge of celebrating Karissa's 1st birthday. I know in adoption that is not always possible, so we are very thankful. The boys sang the happy birthday song to Mui-mui this morning and as a tradition from Happiness Hill Preschool, they continued to sing "we are glad God made you, we are glad God made you, we are glad God made youoooo, we are glad God made you." That just got me thinking of how God made Karissa. So on the BART ride to work, I was overwhelmed with emotions of thankfulness. Psalms 139: 13 -16 says, "For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place, when I was woven together in the depths of the earth. Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be." I often use this verse to tell the boys that God made them special and with a purpose. Every life is valuable because God has a plan for each person. I have always knew this to be true because when I was pregnant with the boys, I knew inside me were precious gifts. But now I realized that God, in His sovereignty planned a precious gift for me inside someone else's womb. I have never thought about it that way. Karissa is a joy to have and I can't imagine our family without her. It's amazing that in just two months we have grown so attached.
Today Mui-mui also had her 12 months well baby check-up and got the result of her blood test. She has a clean bill of health and currently at 19 lbs 4 oz. She gained 2 lbs since we got back to the US. Boo to the nurse that gave her three shots on her birthday.
Her first taste of cake. She loved it! She was holding my hands to make sure that I gave her some. Thank you to Uncle Tim and Auntie Marilyn for the royal outfit.
In the last post, I shared that Caleb spilled his milk right when we were about to leave for school. He deliberately disobey me and kept on going. So when he spilled, I felt like God was keeping me calm and giving me a teachable moment. I must cease it and take advantage of it. I need to teach him that there are consequences to his action. He chose to disobey and kept moving, so he made a mess, which causes him to be late for school. I know this is God because I am usually a mad woman/drill sergeant in the morning trying to get the kids fed and to school. I had Joshie change himself. I gave Caleb a roll of paper towel and had him clean the spill. It took him 15 mins, which made him late to school for the first time. After that, he gathered his things in the speed of light and dash for school. He had to get a tardy slip at the office before going to class. He usually looks forward to playing before the bell rings, but he didn't get to do that. I hope he learned his lesson, but most likely it will take many more times for him to learn that there are consequences to his action. I realized that when I am focused on teaching him and taking advantage of a teachable moment, then I am less angry at the action itself.
What a tough morning I had! This is usually our morning routine to get the kids out the door and to school on time.
6:50 am Set out breakfast and get dress
7:00 Caleb and Joshie get up to dress and brush teeth
7:15 Feed Mui-mui milk
7:25 Help Joshie brush teeth
7:30 Boys eat breakfast and I change mui-mui's diaper
7:40 Pack lunch for everyone
7:55 Must leave the house to be on time to Caleb's school
As you can see, not much time to waste in the morning. I don't have time to eat breakfast myself or feed mui-mui until after I drop the boys off. 25 mins for breakfast is short since they eat slow. But that's the way things are in the morning. The kids can't get up earlier than 7 am because they are tired. But any later, they will be late for school. Today, Caleb and Joshie fooled around at breakfast. They didn't eat much and was being silly. Moving around and laughing. I told them to stop and warned them that they will spill their food. At 7:55 am, when it's time to leave, Caleb spilled his entire cup of milk and got Joshie wet and it was all over the floor. Of course I was upset. I am curious, what would you do at this point?
Today Hebron brought Karissa to get her blood drawn. This is the second attempt. The first time the person at Quest Diagnostic lab in CV poked her three times and can't draw any blood. I didn't want to go back to the same people, so we search around for a place that is more experienced with babies. So finally went to Quest in San Ramon. After poking her many times, they were able to draw blood. Her right arm is literally filled with numerous red dots resulting from the lab work. They took 5 tubes. That is a lot for a baby. Praise the Lord, that the ordeal is over and that Hebron took her. I am not strong enough to go through it. The doctor is testing her for AIDS, Syphilis, Hepatitus, lead, immunization, and a whole bunch of other things. Please pray that the results will show that she is healthy. After blood work, we have to take her to a pediatric cardiologist at Children's Hospital to check the condition of her heart. She was diagnosed with Atrial Septal Defect (ASD), basically a hole in her heart. The pediatrician said that her heart sounds fine and she didn't hear anything unusual.
While Hebron is pinning Mui-mui down at the lab, I was at work. This is my second week back. Work is busy and hectic as my tax busy season is in full swing. Hebron is on Paid Family Leave during the three days that I am at work. We are so thankful to our friends and church friends that brought us food and will be bringing us food. Since I am busy at work, Hebron is suppose to be a stay-at-home dad to take care of the kids, cook, and clean. So he is very releaved that he is getting help with prepared food. We have friends who can really cook. So far meals have been lasagna, chicken pot pie, pasta with chicken, and baked chicken with sweet glaze. Of course there were desserts such as banana muffins, brownies, and cookies. Hmmmmm, everything was so delicious. The kids loved it. I even fed some pasta to Karissa and she swallowed it whole and wanted more. We even had leftover so the kids can bring lunches to school. They ate it all up at lunch too. I should learn to be a better cook like my friends. Thank you so much for your kindness to us. If you need anything, please let us know. We would jump for the opportunity to be a blessing to you and extend a helping hand.
When we went to pick up Karissa in Yunnan province, it was just us and one other family: Brent & Kim. We spent a whole week with them doing many activities together: paperwork, meals, visit to the orphanage, excursions, etc.
After that week, when we went to Guangzhou, where we met up with 16 other families from the same adoption agency that we went through. It was great meeting up with so many families who were on the same life-changing trip as we were. There were a few families and stories that became very memorable for us.
One story is with Todd & Kristine (picture above). They have two biological girls and they are adopting five year Molly from Guizhou province. After they were matched but before they went to China to pick Molly up, they made a photo book for her with pictures of themselves as well as their two girls. On the day that they went to pick her up, Molly walked up happily to Todd, gave him a kiss, and called him, "Papa." Then she walked up to Kristine, gave her a kiss, and called her, "Momma." She was holding the photo book that they sent her. It was very worn by then, because she has been carrying it around with her at the orphanage, showing the pictures to everyone. Molly is such a sweet little girl with a very contagious smile. This little girl caused us to think for the first time that maybe one day, just maybe, God may want us to adopt an older child. It was just a thought, but seeing a precious girl who wanted to be loved and adopted so much just completely melted our hearts. Maybe... just maybe...
This is Karissa's room. It's painted but not decorated. She is able to sleep through the night, so we moved her into her own room last Friday. Hebron slept in there for a few nights and she seemed fine. So now she is sleeping by herself. Everyone is sleeping better now with this arrangement.
Her first time in a dress and Hebron's first time putting on a stocking for a girl.
The boys love feeding Mui-mui cheerios. She loves it.
This week, the boys are back to school and Hebron is back to work. Karissa is over her jet lag and can sleep at night, though sometimes she still wakes up crying. Because Caleb has to be at school by 8 am, all the kids wake up by 7 am. This helps establish a routine for Mui-mui. This is her daily schedule now.
7:00 – Milk
9:00 – Breakfast
9:30 – Morning Nap
11:00 – Milk and/or snack
1:00 – Lunch
3:00 – Early Afternoon Nap
4:30 – Milk and snack
6:30 – Dinner
7:30 – Begin bedtime routine
8:30 – Milk and Bedtime
Mui-mui is eating, drinking, and sleeping much better now. She drinks about 24 oz of milk, eats three bowls of jook, eats some snacks, and drinks juice daily. This is how she eats in China. I am so glad she is eating the same way.
Hebron and I can get at least 6 hours of sleep. I feel like I am beginning to have more energy to tackle daily activities, except I still don’t feel like cooking. Life is almost getting back to normal. Thank you Lord for carrying us through our transition! Thank you for your prayers.
I brought mui mui to run errands and got her the head band.
