Caleb's first verse

Caleb recited his first verse today! I taught Caleb the verse along with some motion a few weeks back and taught it again to him today. When I do the motion, he can say the words. I am so excited. The verse was Genesis 1:1.

Genesis 1:1
In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth.

Christmas Traditions

I love Christmas! It's my favorite time of the year and I hope that my boys will come to love this time of the year not for the gifts, but for what it truly means and for the times we get to spend together as a family. We have decided to start a few traditions to make Christmas a meaningful and memorable time. Together as a family, we read the story of Christ's birth and then acted out what we read. After that we played hide-and-seek to look for the hidden baby Jesus. We then wrapped up our celebration of Christ's birth by making Christmas cookies.

We, as wise men bearing gifts, followed the star in search of baby Jesus, who was born King of the Jews and Savior to ALL.
The Star led us to the baby, who was really Elmo.
Caleb decided that instead of decorating the cookies, it is more efficient if he just eat the candy decorations and watch other people do the hard work.So where was Joshua during all this? He was asleep most of the time, but this is what he looks like now.

To Quit or Not To Quit

For a long time now I have been debating within myself whether or not I should be a stay at home Mom. My line of work is sooo stressful that even on a part time schedule I have to be available to work anytime. And when a tax return is due to a client, it is expected of me to do whatever it takes to meet deadline. My performance is judged, of course, by how well I perform but also by whether or not I can meet deadline. All these years, I have always performed well and exceeded people's expectation of me at work. However, it got harder when I had Caleb. I still tried to work because we needed the money and we wanted to move to a better school district. In whatever I do, I desire to do my best at it and do an exceptional job. I find it really hard to be exceptional at my career and still be an exceptional Mom. In my line of work, the two roles always come in conflict with each other. I want to be at home to teach Caleb, to cook wholesome food, to clean the house(believe me it's dirty), to breastfeed Joshie longer, to embrace each moment of their young lives, to take care of my extended family, and to be a gentle support to my husband (rather than him being a support to my career). When I am at work I desire to learn more, to strive to do my best, and of course to climb that ladder. I have to say I am quite an ambitious person. But on the other hand, I don't want to advance at the expense of my family.

So if the two roles are put side-by-side, I will have to choose to stay at home. The other side of me is afraid that we can't make it by financially and that when I do work again I won't be employable. I really do enjoy my line of work, serving client, learning new things, and being challenged. So you see my dilema?

Then why don't I find another job that's not so demanding you ask? Well, no one wants to hire a part time person. And I don't feel comfortable working full time at this time. It's hard to come home in time to pick up my kids on a full time schedule.

Awake at 3:30am

It was 3:30am when Caleb, our firstborn, suddenly cried loudly. I went to his room to see what happened. Apparently, he was having a nightmare. I calmed him down and went back to bed. As I was laying there in bed, completely exhausted but unable to fall asleep, I recalled a conversation I had with a coworker a couple days ago. She was saying how she is able to fall asleep instantly and be able to go back to sleep if she was ever woken up. I told her I used to be able to do that before having kids, but now, I sometimes have problems falling asleep and staying asleep until morning. To that, she jokingly said, "Sounds like kids ruin your life." As I was laying there in bed at 3:45am trying to fall back to sleep, I remembered that statement. What do I think about?

Raising kids is indeed one of the biggest and hardest task anyone put on me in all my life. However, as it is commonly said, it is also one of the most rewarding thing I have the priviledge to be a part of. Even though I was rudely awaken in the middle of the night, but as I left Caleb's room, he called out to me and said, "I love you." That made it all worth it.

Communion

Today is the first Sunday on the month, so there is communion at church where we eat a tiny waffer and drink grape juice. Symbolically, it represent the body and the blood of Christ, who died on our behave. The pastor told a story about a father who love his son so much that he made a lot of changes and sacrifices for him. And I understood the heart of that father. I will do anything for my kids. I am willing to give up anything and change anything for the sake of them. So during communion, I was still thinking about the many characteristics of my personally that need to change inorder to be a good role model of my kids and also to be a good wife. As I meditate on Christ and how He died for us, I thought, my kids shouldn't be my main motivation for my change, but rather Christ and what He did on the cross. If I truly understand the magnitude of what Christ did, that should lead to complete change, which should lead to total obedience. Changing certain personality is never easy, God is slowly working in me to mold me to the likeness of Christ.

Ask and it shall be given

Last Wednesday after I picked Caleb up from day care and asked how his day was, he told me that Koen, another kid at day care, ate a "long yogurt." He also said that he asked for some and Auntie Grace told him to ask Mommy. So I promised him that tomorrow I will pack him that long yogurt to bring to day care. On my way home from work on Thursday, I thought to myself, Caleb must be really happy because he gets to eat that long yogurt. And I was sooo happy that I can give him what he wants. I generally grant him his request if it's not harmful to him or unreasonable. If he asked for chips before dinner, I would ask him to wait until after dinner. I usually keep my promise and grant him his request.

This incident led me to think about our relationship with God. He loves us so much that, like me, would jump to grant us our requests. Provided that it's not harmful or unreasonable. So I truly believe that if we ask we shall receive. But sometime God ask us to wait for a better time. Like when I asked Caleb to wait until after dinner. If I, a mere imperfect human, know how to give good things to my kids, how much more will God grant us what we want. I now know that God heard all my prayers and I can rest assure that God has my best interest.