God's Gentle Reminder

As soon as the New Year began, work just took off.  Trying to still work out and run amidst my work schedule is leaving me with no time to blog or watch TV.  But I had to blog about this since it's indeed God's way of reminding me to stay on the path. 

I had a touching conversation with J, boy #2 tonight on the drive home just he and I. 
J: I am going to make you a rubber band bracelet, what color would you like?
Me: Purple, why are you making me one?  It's not my birthday or Mother's day.
J:  Because you are my beloved Mama and I love spending time with you.  (Awww!)
Me: Oh, I love you too.  How did you know how to use the word "beloved"?
J: I read it in a book.  Do you love me more now or when I was a baby?
Me:  I love you the same because you are my beloved J.  But I do miss the time when you were a chubby baby.  I love cuddling with you and sleep.  And I loved it when you tried to kiss me but didn't know how so you ended up eating my chin instead. 
J: I don't want to leave home to go to college because I don't want to leave you. 
Me:  You need to go to college.  You will love it because you get to spend lots of time with your friends and learn new things. 
J:  I can spend time with my friends in the day time and come home at night.  I don't want to leave my family. 

WOW!  That touched my heart in such a deep way.  I know that will change when he is a teen, but I am thankful for his heart now.  With all the mistakes that I made and the yelling that I did, I can't believe he still values his time with me. 

Recently, recruiters have been contacting me about job opportunities.  I went on some interviews, but of course they are looking for full time employee.  There is a job that's perfect for me.  Good pay, great industry, and with potential upward possibility.  It's just what my career needs.  They also like me.  So if I am willing to work full time, the job is mine.  But I turned them down and offer to work 80-85% of the work week.  That's the most I've work since C was born.  Of course, they don't want that.  So I didn't get it.  I don't know about other moms, but I've always been thorn between career and family.  I am an ambitious person, I want to achieve more.  But I also want to give my kids my time and attention.  Turning down good jobs are hard for me no matter how many times I did it.  Each time is hard and each time I have to remind myself that home is where God calls me to be.  It's where I should channel my energy.  Sometimes I also wonder, is my sacrifice making a difference?  Or did I do it for nothing?  I wasn't sure of the benefit, but I am sure that's what God wants me to do.  So I keep looking for a part time job because I know He will provide.  Tonight, God used J to remind me that I am making a difference.  My sacrifice is well worth it because J values my time with him.  I will continue to seek for jobs that fits into the family's schedule and priority.  Thank you Lord for reminding me to stay true to what You've called me to and You will take care of the rest.